December 2006 – postcards from the pug bus

Britney Spears Tops Paris Hilton, You as Person of the Year

Chip Hilton 240 Views 3 min read

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – Britney Spears is the Postcards from the Pus Bus 2006 Person of the Year. Ms. Spears captured the title hands down, and occasionally face down, and why not? Hers is easily … Read on

News

President Bush Asked Angelina Jolie to Attend Saddam Hussein Hanging

Chip Hilton 232 Views 2 min read

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Hoping to maximize the public relations bounce from the news of Saddam Hussein’s hanging, President Bush had planned to ask Angelina Jolie to attend the execution of the deposed Iraqi dictator as … Read on

News

Rosie O’Donnell Attacks Betty Ford, James Brown

Chip Hilton 246 Views 2 min read

NEW YORK – Rosie O’Donnell, basking in the attention generated by her feud with Donald Trump, has attacked Betty Ford and the late James Brown. Ms. O’Donnell, formerly a magazine editor and talk show host, … Read on

Celebrities

Angelina Jolie Gives Free Tattoos to Refugees for Christmas

philmaggitti 227 Views 1 min read

COSTA RICA – Crusading artistes Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt swooped into Costa Rica on Christmas day to visit the People’s Tattoo Clinic, which the do-gooding couple is quietly helping to finance.

The swellegant Ms. … Read on

Religion

Sylvester Stallone Says God Wrote Rocky

philmaggitti 275 Views 3 min read

LOS ANGELES – Rocky Balboa climbing off the canvas. Jesus Christ climbing out of the tomb. Mere similarities with no causal connection? Not according to Sylvester Stallone, who told Christian leaders in a conference call … Read on

Celebrities

Britney Spears Vows to Return Worst Dog Owner Award

philmaggitti 231 Views 2 min read

MALIBU – An agitated Britney Spears told reporters she had not “dramatized” her dogs by having sex in front of them, and she “did-dint” deserve to be voted World’s Worst Celebrity Dog Owner of 2006. … Read on

Pug Bus Pop Quiz

Brad Pitt, Katie Holmes, Keith Richards Birthday Quiz

philmaggitti 234 Views 2 min read

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – Brad Pitt, Katie Holmes, and Keith Richards might seem to be strange birthday bedfellows at first, but as our exclusive quiz reveals, they just might have more in common than the … Read on

News

Mel Gibson Apologizes to Mahmoud Ahmadinejad over Holocaust Slight

Biff Scuzzy 243 Views 2 min read

MALIBU – Mel Gibson has apologized to Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad for failing to attend Review of the Holocaust: Global Vision, the scholarly conference that “reexamines” long-established facts about the Holocaust.

The high-profile conference, hosted … Read on

Sporting Life

Duke Offers Alleged Rape Victim’s Baby Legacy Status

philmaggitti 250 Views 2 min read

DURHAM, N.C. – Duke University has reached out to a twenty-eight-year-old student-stripper known as Precious, who claims she was verbally abused while being raped and sodomized by three members of Duke’s lacrosse team at a … Read on

Celebrities

Ben Affleck Quits Acting to Save Daughter

philmaggitti 243 Views 2 min read

LOS ANGELES – Ben Affleck has vowed to give up acting for the sake of his one-year-old daughter, Violet. The star of Hollywoodland made the decision despite having been nominated for his first Golden Globe … Read on

Celebrities

Nancy Grace Sues Tweety Bird

Biff Scuzzy 233 Views 2 min read

ATLANTA, Ga. – Television talk show lawyer Nancy Grace has filed a $300-million lawsuit against cartoon figure Tweety Bird. Citing extreme mental anguish, “worse even than when my old boyfriend got whacked,” Ms. Grace vowed … Read on

Celebrities

Nicole Richie Arrest Sparks Recall of Mercedes-Benz Series

philmaggitti 248 Views 3 min read

LOS ANGELES – The Nicole Richie model SUV has been recalled by Mercedes-Benz, a company spokesman confirmed this morning. The recall, which includes the lightweight NR99 and the ultra-light weight NR85, follows close on the … Read on

News

Bush Twins Sued by RIAA for Illegal Downloading

Biff Scuzzy 244 Views 2 min read

WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a bold and unprecedented move the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) has filed a $22.5-million lawsuit against Jenna and Barbara Bush. The Bush twins, 25, are accused of downloading more … Read on

Celebrities

Lindsay Lohan Accused of Plagiarism

Chip Hilton 222 Views 3 min read

HOLLYWOOD – Lindsay Lohan has been accused of plagiarism by an eighth grade student in Omaha, Nebraska. The student, Shelly Atwater, is a member of Miss Leopold’s homeroom at John Glenn Middle School.

Ms. Atwater … Read on

Celebrities

Wesley Snipes Launches Tax Advice Website

philmaggitti 225 Views 2 min read

OCALA, Fla. – Wesley Snipes talked briefly with reporters yesterday after leaving the courthouse where he had just pleaded not guilty to eight counts of federal income tax fraud.

The star of Jungle Fever and … Read on

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