Apple Fans Scurry to Parse Steve Jobs’s Final Words
PALO ALTO, Calif. – Apple watchers have begun what could be a long and winding effort to interpret the final
ContinueMonth: October 2011
The Grammar Prick Fingers Three Who Misused Begs the Question
WEST CHESTER, Penna, – Hello, boys and girls. The Grammar Prick has a treat for you today. Instead of our
ContinuePresident Obama Restores the Serial Comma to Federal Stylebook
WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Barack Obama is expected to sign an executive order today that will reinstate the rules regarding
ContinueCornel West Reveals Where He Plans to Get Arrested Next
WEST CHESTER, Penna. – Cornel West is on a roll. The silver-tongued, fuzzy-headed, musty-looking Princetonian has been arrested twice in
ContinueYour Snoop Dogg, Grandpa Jones Asshole Buddies Birthday Horoscope
WEST CHESTER, Penna. – Born today you share a birthday—and, if you’re lucky, some birthday brownies—with rapper and human bong
ContinueThe Grammar Prick Sticks It to The Neosecularist and ESPN
WEST CHESTER, Penna. – While navigating the backwaters of the internet yesterday, I nearly ran aground on a website entitled The
ContinueGod Blasts Rick Perry over Intelligent Design and Celebrity Photo Books
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a statement faxed to the editor of THEM Weekly magazine, God the Father Almighty chided presidential candidate Rick
ContinueFirst Steve Jobs Miracles Reported, Brown Declares Steve Jobs Day
CUPERTINO, Calif. – As initial reports of the first miracles credited to the divine intervention of Steve Jobs began flickering
ContinuePresident Obama Threatens NBA Players Who Sign with Foreign Teams
WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Barack Obama said today that National Basketball Association (NBA) players who sign with “foreign teams” during
ContinueNBA Players Union To Decertify, Regroup as Shopper’s Club
New YORK – Claiming that the National Basketball Association owners latest contract offer will make it “more difficult for us
ContinueRepresentative Lamar Smith Is the Ass Hat of the Moment
WEST CHESTER, Penna. – Lamar Smith, chairman of the House of Representatives Judiciary Committee, is the latest winner of the
ContinueTim Lincecum Blames His Dog, Others for Trashing Townhouse
SAN FRANCISCO – Giants pitcher Tim Lincecum blames his dog, Cy, and others for the damage caused to a townhouse
ContinueAmanda Knox Bags High Paying American Express Ad
Amanda Knox: My Life, My Card My name . . . Amanda Knox nickname . . . Foxy Knoxy© perfect
ContinueThe Grammar Prick Rides Hobson’s Choice to Victory
WEST CHESTER, PA—While simultaneously watching The Hour on BBC America last night and reading Nina Burleigh’s The Fatal Gift of Beauty: The Trials
ContinueRaffaele Sollecito Eager to Step Out of Amanda Knox’s Shadow
PERUGIA, Italy – No matter what happens when an Italian court reaches a verdict in the appeals trial of Raffaele
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