September 2019 – postcards from the pug bus

Dishing with the HMFIC of National Penultimate Day℠

Chip Hilton 364 Views 2 min read

Our culture is obsessed with going the extra mile, giving 110 percent, leaving it all on the field. Supermarkets are open 24/7/365 to satisfy our shopping needs from A-to-Z, while athletes routinely crow about taking … Read on

Horoscopes

Ganjascope℠ To Be Featured in Reader’s Digest

philmaggitti 435 Views 5 min read

WEST CHESTER, PA—The Readers Digest and Postcards from the Pug Bus will “partner” to bring the GanjaScope℠ to RD’s 38,000,000 readers beginning in January next year. In return the Pug Bus will run the occasional … Read on

Sporting Life

Dab Rig Manufacturer Issues Refunds for Kaepernick Model

Biff Scuzzy 257 Views 1 min read

SAN FRANCISCO—Rigs-R-Us, the nation’s leading manufacturer of “smoking enhancement technology for the socially conscious,” offered refunds today to any customers who bought a Colin Kaepernick Puffco Peak dab rig that would not start. The Kaepernick … Read on

News

BLM Declares National White Chocolate Day Racist

philmaggitti 271 Views 1 min read

WEST CHESTER, PA—Black Lives Matter (BLM) plans to interrupt tail-gaiting parties at several NFL games this afternoon to protest the celebration of National White Chocolate Day, observed each year on September 22. BLM Minister of … Read on

Culture

SPAM to Introduce Edible Swimwear During Fashion Week

Chip Hilton 248 Views 2 min read

NEW YORK—Hormel Foods, makers of Spam, announced yesterday that it has added edible swimwear to the ever-growing catalog of novelty gift items made in the image and likeness of the popular foodstuff. According to Hormel’s … Read on

Book of Daze News

Pug Bus Service Marks National Penultimate Day℠

philmaggitti 339 Views 2 min read

The National Penultimate Day℠ campaign, launched recently by Postcards from the Pug Bus, took a giant step toward gravitas yesterday when Postcards’ editor in briefs Phil Maggitti applied for service mark registration for the name … Read on

Horoscopes

Ganjascope℠ Wins New York Times Trichome Award

philmaggitti 432 Views 6 min read

The Ganjascope℠, Snoop Dogg’s favorite astrological bulletin, was honored by the New York Times with its First Annual Trichome Award for excellence in marijuana writing. “The Ganjascope© makes dank, bold predictions that challenge credulity without … Read on

Technology

Propane-Driven Vape Pens Blamed for Three Deaths in Amish Country

philmaggitti 306 Views 2 min read

Bird in Hand, PA—News of the deaths of three unrelated Amish youth—Jacob Stolzfus, 18, Lucas Stolzfus, 19, and Cyrus Martin, 21—has exploded like after-market vape pens in this quaintly named Amish community. The youth, who … Read on

Book of Daze

Pug Bus Launches National Penultimate Day Campaign

philmaggitti 282 Views 3 min read

WEST CHESTER, PA—Postcards from the Pug Bus, southeastern Pennsylvania’s least influential web site, today launched its National Penultimate Day campaign by sending a Bewerbungsschreiben to the National Day Calendar requesting that December 30 each year … Read on

Culture

Walmart Intruduces CBD-Infused Dental Dams

Biff Scuzzy 1139 Views 1 min read

NEW YORK—Walmart Inc [NYSE: WMT, 116.92, ▲ 0.90 (0.78%)] announced yesterday that it will begin selling CBD-infused dental dams in all its retail outlets by September 25. The move is seen by industry analysts as … Read on

Culture

How Millennials Can Tell If They’ve Had Sex

philmaggitti 266 Views 2 min read

BLOOMINGTON, Ind.—Researchers at the Kinsey Institute of Sex and Public Policy at Indiana University report that millennials cannot agree on what they mean when they say they’ve “had sex.” This conclusion was based on phone … Read on

Horoscopes

Ganjascope℠, The World’s Most Accurate Pot Horoscope

philmaggitti 437 Views 5 min read

Virgo (8/23 – 9/22): Your sun is in Leo, which could portend trouble because it’s supposed to be in Albuquerque. Leo’s son, meanwhile, has just confessed his love for his stepmother, who is being blackmailed … Read on