Month: December 2019

WEST GOSHEN TWP, Pa.–Today we celebrate National Poisoned Cha-Cha Day in memory of that time when the war between the sexes took a turn for the grim. No man worth his Bushy Beavers subscription can … Read on

In 2009 when Barack Obama was less happy and way less rich, he warned that “a critical shortfall of gravity brought on by the failed gravitational policies of the past” was the greatest existential threat … Read on

Gimme a D … gimme an A, and an R, K … a capital “dub” … and an E,B, too. What’s that spell? What’s that spell? What’s that spell, you deaf mother-fucker? Dark Web, that’s … Read on

Baltimore, MD—Mayor Bernard “Jack” Young urged citizens not to park near white vans because “evil, evil people in white vans” are trolling the city searching for young women to enslave, force into prostitution, and murder, … Read on

Few activities enrage feminists more than side-saddle riding. We’re talking horses, now, not some perverse spin on scissoring. Feminists of every sort—classic, non-binary, echo [sic], inter sectional, intercollegiate, separatist, and beard wearing—lose their … Read on

The Romans had an expression for it . . . “it” being a foul, snot-flinging, food-showing, ass-kicking mood that envelops a person for no reason. The expression was In lectulo surgens sinistram: He got … Read on

Small Town America, who doesn’t love it … or at least the idea of it? Tree-lined streets with a church on every third corner; impish, tow-headed children on loan from a Norman Rockwell painting; no … Read on

The Ten Commandments are a clusterfuck, badly in need of prioritizing. Does skipping church on Sunday really deserve to be on the same list as killing somebody? Should muttering the occasional “Jesus H. Christ” be … Read on

It’s a 1970s game show, a 1932 movie, and a late 1920s marketing ploy designed to bait people into using more matches. It’s three on a match, that’s what it is, Skippy, and today is … Read on