Thursday, April 25, 2024
Culture

San Francisco to Host Young Trannies Beauty Pageant

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SAN FRANCISCO—On Valentine’s Day the Bay Area Gender Benders will host the first annual JonBenét Ramsey Young Trannies Beauty Pageant. Open to innocent children between the ages of four and eight, the Young Trannies pageant will feature talent, fancy dress, and self-defense competitions.

“It’s never too early to foster positive gender images or to let transgender children know how special they are,” said Tripp Evans, recording secretary for the Bay Area Gender Benders.

“And it’s never too early to teach tyranny kids how to kick ass when they have to,“ added Zoe Tur, a uber-butch, trans woman ex-marine with a taste for violence. Miss Tur, who will serve as emcee of the pageant, threatened to send conservative writer Ben Shapiro “home in an ambulance” after grabbing him by the back of the neck during a CNN panel discussion two years ago.

When Mr. Evans was asked why the pageant is named after JonBenét Ramsey, who was murdered twenty-one years ago at the age of six, he replied, “We believe JonBenét was killed by her brother Burke, then nine, because she had told him she wanted to come out as a boy. For Burke, who was jealous of all the attention JonBenét got already, that was the last straw.”

The young trannies pageant, sponsored by Boys ‘R’ Us, Too, is expected to attract more than one hundred contestants. One early entrant is Danni McFadyen, 6, believed to be Britain’s youngest transgender child. When Danni was only three and was still answering to “Daniel,” his mother Kerry McFadyen interrupted him while he was preparing to “cut off his willy.” Since then Mrs. McFadyen has allowed Daniel to live as Danni and has kept him away from scissors.

Danni’s entry in the JonBenét Ramsey Young Trannies Beauty Pageant has been criticized by the parents of local transgender kids, who accused Danni’s mother of “trying to make a killing off her child by entering her in transgender beauty pageants.” Danni had also been criticized because she travels with a make-up artist, beautician, and PR person.

“Most people might think I’m a bad mother for letting my child transition so young,” said Mrs. McFadyen, “but I will do anything to make my child happy.”

In other news: President Obama Pardons All Transgender Children residing in the US Illegally.

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