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Candy, Little Girl

No lie. We've been at this shit for the better or the worse part of twenty-one years. Not many other satire sites can make that brag, humbly or otherwise. Sample an offering from our drop-dead, satisfaction-guaranteed menu, located beneath the box of chocolates below, and win a free puppy.

image of a Whitman's Sampler box of chocolates

Self-Satisfaction Guaranteed

image of old fashioned pinup girl calendar Book of Daze

Who celebrates
National Cupcake
Day? Or National
Registered Nurses
Day? National
Take Your Kid to
Work Day? Screw that and your kid, too. We celebrate the really fun daze that nobody else does.

patron saints for hire

How many saints can dance on the head of a pin? Damned if we know; but we do know that one (or more) of those dancing nancies has the cure for your hemorrhoids--or whatever the fuck else ails you. So tell us where it hurts you, and we'll tell you where to send your donation. Let us pray.

The Grammar Prick

image of the gramar prick

Meaner than a 250-pound, lesbian language arts teacher, the Grammar Prick will split your head if you dare to split an infinitive, not to mention confusing ironic and coincidental. Read on.

Music

P. Diddy in a garish western outfit and cowboy hat, playing a guitar and singing" "Oh give me land, lots of land, under starry skies above; don't fence me in."
MusicNews

Diddy Goes Country, Redemption in Rhinestones

| 2 weeks Author Image philmaggitti 38 Views 2 min read

In a move that has left both hip-hop and country music fans scratching their asses, lady’s man Sean “Diddy” Combs has decided that the best way to whitewash his reputation is by recording a country album. The man who once rapped about Moët and mansions  now wants to sing about pickup trucks and heartbreak. “It Read More

Music

Jerry Garcia, Grateful Dead Stash Sells High

| 8 years Author Image philmaggitti 589 Views 3 min read

SAN FRANCISCO – An attic’s worth of memories associated with the Grateful Dead or its leader, Jerry Garcia, fetched high dollar at auction Tuesday. According to Bonhams & Butterfields Auctioneers, enthusiastic Grateful Dead fans, “many of whom appeared to be in an altered state of consciousness,” spent more than $10.1 million for items ranging from Read More

Music

Rod Stewart Sings Frank Sinatra Jr. Songbook

| 8 years Author Image philmaggitti 540 Views 5 min read

WEST CHESTER, PA—British rocker Rod Stewart was born seventy-two years ago today. American singer Francis Wayne Sinatra (a/k/a/ “Frank Sinatra Jr”), who died last year at the age of seventy-one, was also born on January 10. To celebrate that coincidence, Mr. Stewart released a free-to-download CD of Frank Jr’s “best loved songs” early this morning—along Read More

Music

Blackwater, RIAA Join Forces to Combat Music Piracy

| 10 years Author Image philmaggitti 507 Views 2 min read

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Blackwater USA, the rogue security company accused of sport killing innocent civilians in Iraq, has agreed to provide “tactical enforcement capabilities” for the RIAA (Recording Industry Association of America). “We are proud to be working with the RIAA,” said Blackwater founder, Erik Prince, on 60 Minutes Sunday night. “Every time a scumbag college kid Read More

Music

Roger Daltrey’s Hair Forces Cancellation of Who Tour

| 10 years Author Image philmaggitti 530 Views 2 min read

LONDON—Complications surrounding singer Roger Daltrey’s hair have forced The Who to postpone a North American tour that had been scheduled to begin on September 24 in Portland, Oregon. According to a press release issued by the band’s Who’s Left productions, Mr. Daltrey’s hair, 71, contracted follicular meningitis and was ordered by a doctor to rest. Read More

Music

Taylor Swift Placed Under Suicide Watch (Breaking News)

| 12 years Author Image Chip Hilton 518 Views 2 min read

READING, Pa.–Taylor Swift has been placed under a suicide watch by concerned members of her entourage, the Pug Bus learned today. The popular, six-foot-tall singer-songwriter has been sideswiped by increasingly severe and frequent panic attacks that have played havoc with her mental health and with her ability to write revenge songs. “Taylor is so terrified Read More

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Flash Fiction

image of a sign that says Flash Fiction

Most articles, books, movies, TV shows, and foreplay are twice as long as they need to be. Therefore, Postcards from the Pug Bus is devoted to promoting flash fiction. If you ask ten different people what flash fiction is, you'll get twelve different answers. At the Pug Bus all of our flash-fiction pieces are 50 words: full stop. Anything longer is longer than it needs to be. Read on

image of pug dogs looking out the back of a van
The Pug Bus Blog

Wherein our fearless editor in briefs, who turned eighty-two this year, holds forth and cracks wise about his disdain for soccer moms, feminists of both sexes, the evil that is Mick Jagger, the sorry-ass WNBA, the trans tyranny, the pronoun police, climate scolds, and other blots on the fucking landscape. Read on

The Pug Bus Interview

image of phil maggitti

Presenting the questions that nobody else has the wit or the sack to ask. Featuring an interview with Barry, ex-President Obama's neglected white half.  Read on

image of a loaded gun

Trigger warning! The content of this website may cause raging panic attacks in hypersensitive snowflakes who suffer from androphobia, galactophobia, emetophobia, corprophobia, claustrophobia, fear of taints, and other psycho-sexual maladies too numerous to mention.

image of a round snarky-looking cartoon yellow face

© The fine fucking print: The editorial content on this page is fictional. It is presented for satirical and/or entertainment purposes only. We cannot be held responsible for the actions of anyone who takes this sort of shit seriously. We also do not wish to be held responsible for any copyrighted material that sneaked onto this page when we weren't looking. If you can prove that anything on this page belongs rightfully to you, we will happily take it down and return the unused portion. No questions asked.

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