Postcards from The Pug Bus

..... scientists announce the atmosphere has begun “peeling,” advise citizens to avoid drafts until further notice ..... local oracle reports the sky began a whispered countdown last night; refuses to say what number it started on ..... government assures public that the swarm of identical strangers is “purely coincidental” and “mostly friendly” ..... archaeologists open sealed vault beneath Nebraska, immediately regret believing it was humming their names ...... experts warn that time has begun pooling in low‑lying areas; residents urged to evacuate before yesterday arrives .....