Innerviews

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – A twenty-five-year-old local man whose shit literally does not stink blames his rare condition for ruining his life. The unfortunate man—whom we will call “Helado,” the Spanish word for “ice cream”—told … Read on

WEST CHESTER, PA—Barack Hussein Obama, America’s putative first black president, is a man who knows how to sell a contradiction; but just as no man is a hero to his valet, Barack Hussein is no … Read on

WEST GOSHEN, PA.—Taco Bell’s current ad touting its breakfast crunch wrap sliders features an elderly piggy bank named Clementine and a young fellow named Mark, with whom the piggy bank has shared a room for … Read on

NEW YORK–In an exclusive interview with The New York Times Book Review, God declared confidently that atheism is “deader than the Dead Sea Scrolls” and atheists have only themselves to blame.

Although he was … Read on

WILMINGTON, De.–We’ll call him Ralph. He is one of a growing breed of white-collar hipster criminal: the handicapped-parking-sticker cheat. You can find him from Boston to Baha, parking illegally in a space reserved for someone … Read on

LONDON – Postcards from the Pug Bus has secured an exclusive interview with the Royal Fetus, which is expected to be delivered by Katherine the Duchess of Cambridge any day now. The circumstances of the … Read on

LOS ANGELES – Paris Hilton has been sentenced to forty-five days in a county jail for violating the terms of her drunk-driving probation by operating a motor vehicle with a suspended license.

The twenty-six-year-old celebutant, … Read on