Friday, April 26, 2024
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Hillary Clinton to Explain Why She’s on DC Madam’s List

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WASHINGTON, D.C. – Democratic presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton has scheduled a press conference for tomorrow morning at which she is expected to explain why her name appears on the client list of Deborah Jeane Palfrey, the notorious DC madam.

Ms. Clinton hastily called the press conference today after The Drudge Report had claimed that her name, along with the names of prominent lesbians Rosie O’Donnell, Ellen DeGeneres, and Melissa Etheridge—and suspected lesbian Oprah Winfrey—will be mentioned when Ms. Palfrey’s ten-thousand-name list is read on a special three-hour edition of The View this Friday.

“The senator has a perfectly reasonable explanation for the appearance of her name on that woman’s list,” said Josh Fetters, a spokesman for Ms. Clinton.

Although Mr. Fetters would not discuss that explanation, he did admit that Ms. Clinton’s husband, Bill, would appear at tomorrow’s press conference and would “probably” speak there.

Mr. Clinton’s appearance suggests to some observers that he will play a role in her explanation.

“It wouldn’t surprise me if he claimed that he ordered a massage from the escort service then ‘inadvertently’ paid for it with Hillary’s credit card,” said Rush Limbaugh. “Why not? He owes her one now that the stains are on the other pants in that family.”

Next Oprah: Deborah Jeane Palfrey Exposed    

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