The Self-Improvement Industry Would Like You to Stop Enjoying Yourself

I have recently learned that I have been sleeping all wrong–neglecting my REM cycles, sleep efficiency scores, and something called recovery readiness. Fortunately, several companies in the self-improvement industry will help me correct these deficiencies for $19.99 a month.

The self-improvement industry has identified similar deficiencies in virtually every aspect of human existence. Drinking water, once facilitated by becoming thirsty, now requires an app, a personalized hydration schedule, and a stainless-steel container the size of a fire extinguisher. Walking is no longer walking unless a device confirms that I have taken a sufficient number of steps in a day. Even enjoying a quiet cup of coffee should be an occasion for practicing gratitude, establishing intentions, and listening to a podcast about achieving financial independence before breakfast.

The underlying message in all this is that the self-improvement industry wants you to stop enjoying yourself. Resting is now recovery. Eating is fueling. Taking a walk is cardiovascular maintenance. Sitting quietly on the porch, watching a squirrel negotiate a bird feeder,  contributes nothing to one’s long-term growth.

The self-improvement industry has even managed to turn relaxation into a competitive activity. There are breathing exercises to master, meditation streaks to maintain, and mindfulness instructors prepared to explain why our attempts at doing nothing lack sufficient focus.

The greatest luxury left is an afternoon during which nothing productive happens, nothing gets measured, and nobody learns anything about themselves.

Of course there is probably an app for that. And somewhere a consultant is developing a subscription plan to help us employ it more efficiently.

If the ramblings of our fearless editor in briefs fancy your tickle, wander over to his Satirical Commentary page and try a line or two.