Dolly Parton’s Breasts Remembered Fondly by Her Peers
As tributes continue to pour in following the death of Dolly Parton at eighty, friends, fellow entertainers, and country music historians are paying homage to her extraordinary songwriting, generosity, and business acumen. Dolly Parton’s breasts, meanwhile, are being remembered as cultural institutions in their own right, having enjoyed a remarkably successful career of their own.
“They were always there for her,” said Nashville music historian Gordon Pritchard, 64, who owns every Porter Wagoner album except the good one.
“Through the hits, the movies, Dollywood, the lean years, the comeback years. They never left her hanging.”
Parton herself spent decades joking about her celebrated cleavage, thereby depriving comedians of the satisfaction of believing they had noticed something first.
Country singer Wanda Creel, 71, who sorts her rhinestone jackets by weight, remembers meeting Parton backstage in 1983.
“Dolly entered the room several seconds after her breasts did,” Creel recalled. “But somehow she was still the biggest presence.”
Scholars say Dolly Parton’s breasts occupied a unique place in American popular culture, simultaneously functioning as sex symbols, punch lines, structural engineering challenges, and proof that gravity occasionally accepts bribes.
“They were enormous, obviously,” said Dr. Leonard Vick, 58, professor of Cultural Studies at Middle Tennessee State University and author of Cleavage and the Country Imagination. “But reducing them to size misses their larger dimensions.”
Vick paused. “I probably could have phrased that better.”
Dolly Parton’s breasts appeared with her in 9 to 5, The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, and Steel Magnolias, although neither ever received separate billing.
The Country Music Hall of Fame declined to comment on whether they qualify for individual induction, saying its bylaws require “a clearly identifiable musical contribution.”
Supporters immediately cited Dolly’s ability to play guitar while looking over them.
“They were part of the package,” said retired Nashville talent agent Harvey Loomis, 76, who still refers to compact discs as “the new format.” “Dolly understood that better than anybody. She had the voice, the songs, the hair, the wit and the boobs. That’s not an image. That’s vertical integration.”
Yet friends insist the attention never went to their heads. “They stayed remarkably grounded,” Creel said. “Considering they spent most of their lives nowhere near the ground.”
When funeral arrangements are announced, the breasts are expected to enjoy a large turnout.
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