How Well Do You Know Tay-Tay?

Welcome to the ultimate Tay-Tay gauntlet — a glitter-soaked, heartbreak-fueled, cat-adjacent test of your Swiftie knowledge, where lyrical lore meets parasocial fever dreams. This isn’t your grandma’s fan quiz (unless your grandma tracked the carbon footprint of the Eras Tour). We’re diving deep into the Easter-egg-strewn labyrinth of Taylor’s universe, where every ex might be a metaphor and every friendship bracelet holds the key to pop prophecy. Buckle up, buttercup — it’s time to find out if you’re a casual listener or a full-blown cardigan cultist.

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1. Taylor Swift has dated which of the following? A) Hollywood’s finest B) Most of the British Isles C) A Kennedy (because why not?) D) All of the above, and possibly your barista
   
2. “All Too Well (10 Minute Version)” is best described as: A) A gut-wrenching breakup saga B) A public trial with Jake Gyllenhaal as the defendant C) Proof that scarf custody should be legally binding D) A national anthem for emotionally available bookworms
   
3. What mythical feat did Taylor accomplish during her Eras Tour? A) Actually made Ticketmaster implode B) Performed for 3.5 hours straight without a bathroom break C) Caused time to fold in on itself during the Folklore set D) Summoned every ex-boyfriend’s ghost for a group therapy dance-off
   
4. Which cat of Taylor’s is rumored to have its own tax attorney? A) Olivia Benson B) Meredith Grey C) Benjamin Button D) All of them — showbiz is ruthless
   
5. What will likely happen when Taylor re-records her debut album again in 2045? A) She’ll include a hologram duet with herself B) She’ll time-travel and reclaim her masters retroactively C) Millennials will weep into their oat lattes D) Global peace
   
6. What is Taylor Swift’s ultimate weapon in a feud? A) A cryptic Instagram post B) A Grammy-winning diss track C) A squad of supermodels D) All of the above, deployed with surgical precision
   
7. Which of the following is NOT a Taylor Swift album? A) Reputation B) Midnights C) Unapologetic D) Speak Now
   
8. What is Taylor’s favorite Easter egg strategy? A) Hiding clues in her lyrics B) Wearing suspiciously themed outfits C) Releasing cryptic videos that send fans into a decoding frenzy D) All of the above, because she’s basically the Zodiac Killer of pop
   
9. What’s the most likely reason Taylor Swift hasn’t run for president yet? A) She’s too busy re-recording her albums B) All the politicians she endorses lose C) She’s already the unofficial ruler of the Swiftiverse D) She’s waiting for Olivia Benson to be her VP
   
10. What happens when you criticize Taylor Swift on the internet? A) Swifties flood your mentions with snake emojis B) You mysteriously lose your Spotify account C) A 10-minute song about you drops the next day D) All of the above, and you deserve it

Scoring System: If you answered …

• Mostly As: You’re a casual fan who thinks 1989 is a year, not an album. You’re welcome at the party, but don’t touch the vinyl collection.
• Mostly Bs: You’re a mid-level Swiftie. You’ve cried to “All Too Well” but still think “Easter eggs” are for kids.
• Mostly Cs: You’re a certified Swiftologist. You’ve decoded her Instagram posts and probably have a corkboard with red string connecting her lyrics.
• Mostly Ds: You’re in a parasocial marriage with Taylor. You’ve named your pets after her cats and are currently drafting a dissertation on the Folklore cinematic universe.