Scarlett Johansson’s Bum Reportedly Signs Deal with American Express

Scarlett Johansson’s bum and American Express: the perfect fit. Ms. Johansson never leaves home without them.
Scarlett Johansson: My Life, My Card
Name . . . Scarlett Johansson
Born . . . November 22, 1984
Sign . . . gluteus maximus rising
Childhood ambition . . . to have a really great bum when I grew up
Hope for the world . . . that my bum could be cloned
Favorite music . . . anything by the Ass Ponys
Biggest challenge . . . not acting like my bum weighs a ton
Perfect day . . . when nobody hacks my iPhone account
Proudest moment . . . when my bum was featured in the opening of Lost in Translation
Greatest lesson . . . learning early on the difference between my bum and a hole in the ground
Fondest memory . . . winning Time‘s 2003 Bum of the Year award
Great disappointment . . . that my bum has never appeared on a Franklin Mint coin, yet
Most embarrassing moment . . . when my bum was cited as the inspiration for Katy Perry’s “I Kissed A Girl”
Greatest fear . . . that I might get Assperger’s syndrome
My life is . . . more exciting than yours because I’ve got a better bum
My card is . . . American Express, you tool.
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