December 2005 – Page 2 – postcards from the pug bus

Tom Cruise Pitching Brokeback Mountain Prequel

Chip Hilton 229 Views 2 min read

HOLLYWOOD – Tom Cruise, who reportedly turned down the role of Jack Twist in Brokeback Mountain, is quietly angling to play Twist’s gay ranch cook in a prequel to Brokeback Mountain called Out Behind … Read on

Celebrities

Paris Hilton’s High Colonic Adventure, An Inside Look

philmaggitti 222 Views 3 min read

LOS ANGELES – Paris Hilton is about to appear nearly naked in a television commercial once again. This time, however, instead of doing a lap dance on a high-powered black car, Hilton will be stretched … Read on

Celebrities

Nicole Richie Book Caused Split with Fiance

Biff Scuzzy 205 Views 2 min read

HOLLYWOOD – Nicole Richie’s book The Truth about Diamonds apparently contained too much “truth” about her fiance, Adam Goldstein, a professional club DJ who goes by the name DJ AM.

According to friends of the … Read on

Celebrities

Jennifer Aniston Sued over Topless Photos

Chip Hilton 223 Views 2 min read

LOS ANGELES – Jennifer Aniston is being sued by photographer Peter Brandt, who charges that Aniston “wantonly exposed her breasts” in her backyard, thereby interfering with his ability to earn a living.

According to an … Read on

Religion

Jesus Christ Unhappy with Chronicles of Narnia Campaign

philmaggitti 229 Views 3 min read

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN – The Lord God Jesus Christ is “sore displeased” with the Disney Corporation. Through a special arrangement with Google, Jesus issued via Gmail a simultaneous statement to 4,500 news sources around the … Read on

Culture

President Bush to Withdraw Serial Comma

philmaggitti 258 Views 3 min read

WASHINGTON, D.C. – A high-level source in the White House, speaking on condition of anonymity, has revealed that President Bush will announce in a major television address tomorrow night that he is withdrawing the serial … Read on

Celebrities

Jennifer Aniston Mocks Pitt for Adopting Jolie’s Kids

Chip Hilton 222 Views 2 min read

PHOENIX, Ariz. – Brad Pitt has filed a legal petition in Los Angeles seeking to change the names of Angelina Jolie’s children to Zahara Brangelina and Maddox Brangelina. His decision was met with scorn from … Read on

Celebrities

Jessica Simpson Thought Prenuptial Agreement Would Lead to Sex

philmaggitti 230 Views 1 min read

HOLLYWOOD – Jessica Simpson did not sign a prenuptial agreement before marrying Nick Lachey because she was determined to remain a virgin until her wedding night.

According to Access Hollywood, Lachey reportedly had a prenuptial … Read on