Celebrity Shockers | Outrageous Celebrity Moments, Arrests & Meltdowns

Postcards from The Pug Bus

Lifting a satirical leg on popular culture

Persons in the Ether

Question of the Week

Texting or calling?

Marlene Bishop, 67, retired church potluck seating consultant

Allegedly deciding at 104 Courtesy Court, Paducah, KY

Calling. If someone cares enough to hear my voice, I can spare five minutes. Besides, half the arguments I have witnessed began because somebody interpreted a period at the end of a text as emotional warfare.

Gordon Tully, 43, professional instruction manual translator

Allegedly replying from 8 Read Receipt Lane, Missoula, MT

Texting. Telephones assume I am prepared for conversation at any random moment. I object to that level of optimism.

Rita Hollis, 52, neighborhood rumor verification officer

Allegedly confirming details at 55 Busy Signal Drive, Wilmington, NC

Calling. You can learn more from six seconds of hesitation than six paragraphs of carefully edited texting. Human beings leak the truth through awkward silences.

"Whose pyramid scheme?"

Celebrity Shockers

Britney Spears to Deliver Baby Live in September

Chip Hilton Britney Spears, Paris Hilton 21 years

HOLLYWOOD – Britney Spears, not content to let her sister, Jamie-Lynn, break the news that Britney is due to give birth to her first baby… Read More

Taylor Swift sitting on a bed with a guitar writing a song. An illustration for this article about Taylor Swift songs and their inspirations.

Taylor Swift pretending to write about your feelings instead of hers — again.

Celebrity Shockers

Brad Pitt Makes Scrutinized Public Appearance

philmaggitti 21 years

BEVERLY HILLS – Brad Pitt made a run-of-the-mill, buss-and-bolt appearance at the annual Hollywood Foreign Press Association luncheon Wednesday. Pitt’s reason for attending—to accept a… Read More

"Bring me the head of St. Paul."

Celebrity Shockers

Colin Farrell Obtains Face-Saving Injunction

Chip Hilton Paris Hilton 21 years

LOS ANGELES – People are beginning to wonder why Colin Farrell is so desperate to prevent his former girlfriend Nicole Narain from releasing the X-rated… Read More

a cartoon of an open mail box with a screaming face looking out

"You've got mail, tool"

Celebrity Shockers

Jude Law Apologizes to a Burnt Sienna Miller Again

philmaggitti 21 years

LONDON – Jude Law, fresh off his wrenchingly public Sunday apology to ex-fiancee Sienna Miller, has issued a second mea culpa to her for seducing… Read More

Illustration of a man overwhelmed at a desk as dozens of printed photographs swirl around his head, symbolizing the curse of a photographic memory and relentless total recall.

A photographic memory is just regret in high resolution.

Celebrity Shockers

Sandra Bullock Wedding a Monster Mistake

Chip Hilton Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton 21 years

LAS VEGAS – Oddsmakers have set the over-under figure for the Sandra Bullock-Jesse James marriage at fourteen months, and the early money has been trending… Read More

Indigenous riders in traditional regalia cross a desert at sunset, proclaiming sovereignty over stolen land with flags, feathers, and a dramatic mesa backdrop.

The stars filed a complaint, and the land agreed.

Celebrity Shockers

Jude Law Apologies for Seducing the Nanny

Biff Scuzzy 21 years

LONDON – A distraught and groveling Jude Law apologized publicly to his fiancee, actress Sienna Miller, after she had read a newspaper article claiming that… Read More

Tall shadow looming behind frightened woman on city street at dusk, illustrating absurd shadow government crisis and disorientation among unsuspecting citizens.

She ordered a quiet evening. The universe sent a taller opinion.

Celebrity Shockers

Diaz Tells Court She’s Proud of Her Breasts

Chip Hilton 21 years

LOS ANGELES – Cameron Diaz told a fascinated jury yesterday that she is as proud of her breasts “as any mother would be of her… Read More

Anthropomorphic purple cat in striped suit holding cane

Celebrity Shockers

Cameron Diaz Accuses Karl Rove of Leaking Photos

philmaggitti Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton 21 years

LOS ANGELES – Cameron Diaz is scheduled to testify in court today that John Rutter, the photographer who snapped S&M photos and video footage of… Read More