philmaggitti, Author at Postcards from The Pug Bus

A red zodiac wheel with twelve astrological symbols arranged in a circle on a light background, A minimalist illustration used for satirical horoscopes.

The stars are confident. You should be concerned.

Your Satirical Horoscopes: Guidance for People Who Should Know Better

Aries You will mistake momentum for wisdom, and volume for leadership. This will not stop you from charging forward like someone who has never been… Read More

The image captures a Temporal Hangover as Arthur experiences a total collapse of personal synchronicity while his physical form deserts his consciousness in the bathroom. While his mind struggles to process the cold porcelain of the sink, his body has already committed to the next twenty-seven minutes of his morning routine. He is a man haunted by his own momentum, watching himself vanish into a future that he is not yet ready to inhabit.

A secular holy trinity?

Book of Daze

Book of Daze: Temporal Hangover Day

philmaggitti bookof-daze 4 months

The sun storms through the curtains and hits Arthur like a physical assault. The real problem, however, of this temporal hangover day, is that Arthur’s… Read More

A whimsical and colorful illustration of diverse, quirky characters wearing costumes and flippers, featuring speech bubbles with silly New Year's resolutions for January, February, and March on a clean, light background.

Look at these absolute legends committing to a life of total nonsense while you are probably over there crying into a kale smoothie and promising to hit the treadmill.

Culture

Silly New Year’s Resolutions for Silly People

philmaggitti cultural commentary 4 months

We have peered deep into the turbulent, chaotic upheavals of the cosmos to bring you these silly New Year’s resolutions. Today the celestial alignment is… Read More

Illustration of Brother Thaddeus discovering offbeat egg nog uses in a medieval cellar.

Local monk discovers one weird trick to ruin a perfectly good stone cellar and four million lives using nothing but poultry sludge.

Culture

The Underside of the Holidays: Ten Deranged Egg Nog Uses

philmaggitti cultural commentary 4 months

Deranged egg nog uses were born in the shivering, lightless winter of 1243, when a delirious monk named Brother Thaddeus found himself trapped in a… Read More

An older man named Alistair sits in a dark, wood-paneled library in Connecticut, wearing a gold paper crown and staring sadly at a lukewarm pork pie. He is draped in a moth-eaten Union Jack flag while holding a pewter mug, surrounded by high bookshelves, two sleeping dogs, and a steaming humidifier, perfectly illustrating the answer to when is boxing day which is December 26.

His friends mocked his "Burger King" crown.

Culture

When Is Boxing Day? Who Cares?

philmaggitti cultural commentary 4 months

The origins of Boxing Day are not about charity or leftovers. People wondering when is Boxing Day–after they have stopped wondering what is Boxing Day–need… Read More

An illustration for the Reddit users article. A lone person sitting in a drab basement hunched over, typing earnestly on a glowing laptop. Looming directly behind is a translucent, ghostly figure representing a lazy journalist.

The Journalist in His Natural Habitat: Harvesting others' ideas like a digital tapeworm.

Culture

Quoting Reddit Users You Have Not Interviewed Ought to Be a Capital Crime

philmaggitti cultural commentary 4 months

In the annals of modern media, a new breed of wannabe “reporter” has emerged, wielding not a tape recorder or a notebook, but a scroll… Read More

Forget your actual future because these amusing horoscopes prove the universe is just a drunk toddler with a Twitter account.

Horoscopes

Amusing Horoscopes for the Criminally Insane

philmaggitti horoscopes 4 months

Aries (Mar 21 – Apr 19) Mars is busy binge‑watching reality TV in these amusing horoscopes. Therefore, your usual “charge ahead” vibe will be replaced by an inexplicable urge… Read More

Cartoon illustration of a confused man assembling a final instructions funeral kit on the floor, surrounded by instruction diagrams.

Some forethought required. Closure not included.

Culture

The Final Instructions Funeral Kit

philmaggitti cultural commentary 4 months

The final instructions funeral kit arrives in biodegradable packaging the color of oat milk, because even death has an aesthetic. Marketed to the “extreme self-care” community,… Read More