philmaggitti, Author at Postcards from The Pug Bus

Astrological nightmares illustration: a performer abandoned on stage, audience chairs turned away, cat refusing to look.

"I did it my way ..."

Introducing Astrological Nightmares Day

Today is Astrological Nightmares Day, a holiday no one asked for but everyone deserves. Forget chasing dreams, today your subconscious drags you through the swamp… Read More

Illustration depicting the absurd rituals of sports fandom: four exaggerated characters—including a toga-clad philosopher, a furious bald man, a screaming elderly woman, and a parrot in a tricorn hat—stand atop a pedestal labeled ‘HATRED,’ booing a football player mid-stride. Framed by ornate columns and a rainbow arch,

Haters gonna hate,

Sporting Life

Negative Rooting, Sports Fandom for the Morally Outraged

philmaggitti 7 months

There exists a tradition in sports fandom, seldom acknowledged and rarely celebrated, in which the true sportsman finds his deepest pleasure not in the thrill… Read More

Go big or go home illustration. a split panel artwork showing contrast between extremes: a rocket blasting off with flames and smoke on one side, and a person snoozing peacefully in a recliner with a cat on their lap on the other.

“Go Big or Go Home: either launch a rocket or take a nap with the cat —it's your call.”

Book of Daze

Book of Daze: Go Big or Go Home Day

philmaggitti bookof-daze 7 months

It is difficult to say precisely when “Go big or go home” wriggled out of the primordial ooze of marketing slogans and frat-house chants, but… Read More

Disheveled man in underwear horsing around with his own contradictions, eating cereal from a chipped bowl while staring at silk pajamas on a laptop screen.

"If I had those silk pajamas, my life would finally make sense."

Horoscopes

Horsing Around With Horoscopes

philmaggitti horoscopes 7 months

Welcome to today’s cosmic corral, where the stars are horsing around, less interested in guiding your destiny than in trampling your dreams underfoot. Forget divine… Read More

Harry Styles running a marathon in disguise while other celebrities in fake mustaches, wigs, pseudonyms, and sunglasses try to pass unnoticed.”

Trump's about to come from behind,

Sporting Life

Celebrities Who Competed Under Pseudonyms

philmaggitti top ten lists, trump 7 months

Harry Styles thought he was clever slipping into the Berlin Marathon as “Sted Sarandos.” But he is just the latest in a long, ignoble tradition… Read More

Britney Spears barefoot on a cracked CD stage, holding jeweled keys, surrounded by floating emojis and glitter in a surreal cosmic setting.

Oops, she's doing it again.

Celebrity Shockers

Britney Spears Is Off the Leash Again

philmaggitti Britney Spears, celebrity shockers 7 months

The pop princess emerita is back on the loose, twirling through provocative Instagram posts and giving the culture vulture machine one more whirl of its… Read More

In this middle name day illustration, a pudgy boy in a schoolyard wears a green shirt labeled "Horace Moisture Puddington" as three other kids laugh and point at him.

Spare a thought for Horace Moisture Puddington, patron saint of playground ridicule.

Book of Daze

Book of Daze: Middle Name Day

philmaggitti bookof-daze 7 months

Somewhere between the christening font and the DMV counter lies the cruelest prank ever played on humanity: the middle name. Ostensibly created as a dignified… Read More

The key to the cosmos, unlocking doors you never knew the universe kept locked.

Horoscopes

Keyword Horoscopes

philmaggitti horoscopes 7 months

Keywords, for the computer illiterate, are shiny little bait words that websites toss at Google like glitter at a bachelor party. They are meant to… Read More