postcards from the pug bus

CHICAGO – Jennifer Aniston is either pregnant or in denial about her breakup with Vince Vaughn, or possibly both. These conflicting reports emerged following Ms. Aniston’s appearance at a taping for The Oprah Winfrey Show last week. They were provided by moles who had attended the taping at the request of several gossip magazines. “Jen sure looked Read More

HOLLYWOOD – Hoping to establish themselves as mature actresses and to patch up their friendship, Lindsay Lohan and Jessica Simpson have agreed to appear in The Vagina Dialogues. The new, two-woman play by Harvard dropout Kaavya Viswanathan is scheduled to open on Broadway next summer. The Vagina Dialogues tells the story of two estranged friends whose vaginas Read More

BOSTON – According to reports published in the current issues of the journals Nature and Science, a new comparison of the genetic blueprints of chimpanzees and humans shows that a mere sliver of DNA separates Courtney Love and other celebrities from chimps. The controversial reports are based on a genome-mapping project funded by the National Institutes of Health Read More

MALIBU – Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn have separated after failing to agree about the kind of child they should adopt, reports US Weekly. Friends of the couple are saying, however, that Ms. Aniston and Mr. Vaughn could not agree on the species they should adopt. “Vince was thinking an African kid,” said Mr. Vaughn’s close Read More

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – Once again George Clooney is whining about all the attention he gets from paparazzi, and once again he’s mad as hell and he’s not going to take it anymore. Boy George told Vanity Fair in his usual self-important way that he has developed a “theory on debunking photographs in magazines, you know, the Read More

LOS ANGELES – Hoping to squelch rumors that their relationship has hit the skid marks, and to capitalize on the success of Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have agreed to star as Mr. & Mrs. Beowulf in the big-budget musical-thriller of the same name. Mr. & Mrs. Beowulf is adapted from Beowulf, the first musical Read More

LOS ANGELES – Hoping to squelch rumors that their relationship has hit the skid marks, and to capitalize on the success of Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have agreed to star as Mr. & Mrs. Beowulf in the big-budget musical-thriller of the same name. Mr. & Mrs. Beowulf is adapted from Beowulf, the first musical Read More

LOS ANGELES – During an appearance on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, Jessica Simpson addressed a wide range of topics from her disappointment with psycho-therapy to the strange effect her celebrity has on men. She even attempted a joke, telling a startled-looking Ms. DeGeneres at one point, “You know, Helen, I seem to scare away guys too.” Read More

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – The campaign to spay Britney Spears, launched in May by Postcards from the Pug Bus, southeastern Pennsylvania’s leading celebrity satire website, was given renewed life yesterday when Ms. Spears delivered her second son. “This is the leg up our campaign needs,” said Phil Maggitti, editor in briefs of the Pug Bus. Read More