“We regret to inform you that these blueberries may cause optimism. Please consume in a controlled setting.”
The Food and Drug Administration announced today that all edible products sold in the United States must now carry side effects labels describing a food’s… Read More
The legacy of Joe Paterno is a master class in the failure of the blind eye. When the view became inconvenient, Joe simply traded his… Read More
The nation’s grocery sector faces a period of instability following an announcement by the Self‑Checkout Workers Alliance that it intends to unionize. Supermarket Self-checkout Machines,… Read More
Today’s horoscopes have been formatted according to each sign’s “core personality,” a term we use loosely, since most of you have none. Please do not… Read More
Because Artificial Intelligence (AI) is a digital rockstar—complete with the erratic moods, expensive maintenance requirements, and a persistent habit of making things up as it… Read More
Friedrich stuck his hand into the mailbag this morning and pulled out three letters: The yoga class humiliation, The Group Chat Problem, and The Personal… Read More
Federal health officials issued a stern advisory today, warning Americans about the growing dangers of too much mindfulness meditation, which has been linked to chronic… Read More
Astrology was invented to explain destiny. Pharmaceuticals were invented to explain harmful side effects. It was only fitting that these purveyors of vague promises and… Read More
