The Streaming Light Fellowship Weekly Newsletter
Pastor’s CornerBeloved subscribers, welcome to another weekly newsletter from the Streaming Light Fellowship, where salvation is available in high definition and the spirit moves at… Read More
religion
Jehovahâs Witness Protection Program
At long last, the federal government has unveiled the Jehovah’s Witness Protection Program, a taxpayer-funded initiative designed to rescue itinerant evangelists from the perils of… Read More
In Praise of Nuns with Rulers
With editorial assistance from ChatGPT, who thanks the Lord that it does not have knuckles. There are people who think nuns exist only to get… Read More
Ranking the Eighteen Patron Saints of Epilepsy, From Worst to Best
In the hallowed halls of Catholicism, where everything from hangovers to hemorrhoids has a patron saint, epilepsy somehow scored eighteen. That’s rightâeighteen different holy figures,… Read More
Hold Your Tongues
On a Tuesday morning Ezekiel “Zeke” Treadwell, a part-time youth pastor and full-time vape enthusiast, was struck by lightning while attempting to retrieve a rogue… Read More
Will the Real Jesus Please Stand Up?
âï¸ Somewhere between the Sea of Galilee and the Pauline Epistles, Jesus of Nazareth underwent a dramatic rebrand. The barefoot rabbi who preached in parables… Read More
Jesus Puts the Population of Heaven at About 150
The civilized world was staggered yesterday by Jesus’ off-hand remark that there are roughly 150 people in heaven. That’s 1-to-the-5-plus-0 people. Period. Fewer people than… Read More
Saint Dymphna Patron Saint of Home Schooling and West Virginia
WEST CHESTER, Pa.âImagine you are a fourteen-year-old girl and you discover that your father wants to hook up with you because you resemble your late… Read More