philmaggitti, Author at Postcards from The Pug Bus

Image of a cartoon Jennifer Anniston in a white bikini.

When your body develops a mind of its own, suddenly the red carpet gets a lot more interesting.

Jennifer Aniston’s New Body Confident with Jennifer Aniston

Editor’s Note: This masterwork first dropped in 2005, back when Jennifer Aniston and her love life was a national sport and low-rise jeans were a… Read More

The stars are throwing a block party.

Horoscopes

Harebrained Horoscopes

philmaggitti horoscopes 1 year

Welcome to Harebrained Horoscopes, where the stars are drunk, the planets are on strike, and the moon is texting you at 3 a.m. just to… Read More

Sony software llustration of an angry gatekeeper holding a barred gate locked with a DRM padlock, symbolizing control and restriction of music playback.

Sony as the self-appointed warden of your music, guarding every one of your 100 precious plays.

Music Technology

Sony Software Will Limit CD Plays (Tech Satire)

philmaggitti music, tech satire 1 year

Editor’s Note: This relic from our digital catacombs proves that some jokes never go out of date, even when the jokes were on us. Consider it… Read More

In tech satire Bill Gates dressed as a preacher, holding a glowing laptop with a cross on the screen as binary code rains from a golden sky, satirical tech sermon vibe

Bill Gates delivering the gospel of Windows, one patch at a time.

Technology

Tech Satire from the Bible Belt (Microsoft Buys Christian Software)

philmaggitti tech satire 1 year

Editor’s Note: This relic from our digital Bible Belt catacombs proves that some jokes never go out of date–unlike Internet Explorer. Microsoft may have moved… Read More

Top ten reasons for avoiding jury duty illustration of a woman seated beside a colony of red-capped mushrooms, transcribing their dreams.

My mushrooms are deep in REM. I archive their dreams while justice naps.

Top Ten Lists

Ten Reasons for Avoiding Jury Duty

philmaggitti top ten list 1 year

Jury duty: the sacred civic rite where one’s fate is decided not by gods or algorithms, but by twelve strangers who once Googled “how to… Read More

Illustration for Return-to-Sender Day, Surreal space post office returning cosmic junk mail through a glowing wormhole

When life ships you junk, ship it back to the cosmos—no restocking fee

Book of Daze

Book of Daze Return-to-Sender Day: How to Reject Life’s Cosmic Junk

philmaggitti bookof-daze 1 year

Origin StoryThe Book of Daze Return-to-Sender Day was created in response to the cosmos’ disturbing habit of hurling unsolicited life events our way. flat tires,… Read More

Surreal psychedelic horoscope poster with each zodiac sign shown in absurd cartoon style — Aries with a frisbee, Taurus as a lawn chair, Gemini lawyers, a tidepool Pisces, and a dramatic rainbow background.

When the stars stop whispering and start trolling.

Horoscopes

Hot Happening Horoscopes, 09/13

philmaggitti horoscopes 1 year

(Sinning the cosmic wheel of nonsense, gathering up the crumbs, and serving with a side of existential dread and zero refunds: in Hot Stuff Horoscopes)… Read More

Ass Hat of the moment Nomination: To the self-anointed truth tellers who saw Kirk’s death as a chance to dance — congratulations, you just wrote your own obituaries.

Dancing with the Devils

Dunce Caps

Dunce Caps of the Moment: Charlie Kirk Death Dancers

philmaggitti dunce caps 1 year

To every self-styled “truth teller” who celebrated Charlie Kirk’s murder: you are not brave, you are not clever, you are not righteous – you are… Read More